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Have you ever wondered how some people seem to find it so effortless to stick to the great habits they choose for themselves while others may have an equally compelling appreciation of the value in such habits however it’s a constant, frustrating, battle with themselves to try and enforce the habit?

As I sat at my local with some mates on Sunday – and effortlessly declined – the decidedly-delicious looking and smelling hot chips the rest of the group were devouring I wondered what helped me make the switch?

What makes my previous fav food easily off-limits?

It’s not that I’m a discipline Queen. It’s not even my hugely compelling goal.

What helps me succeed with the not eating hot chips habit is the same thing that causes me to struggle with the habits I haven’t yet made effortless. YOUR answer to that soon…

In todays show I’m weighing-in on: Effortless Eating HABITS.

It’s all about creating the habit that is aligned with YOUR natural tendencies. 

In relation to food I’ve previously talked about The Rules or The Guidelines Eater. To recap…

First: The RULES Eater.

That’s the person that likes to have a plan to stick to. You actually find it FREEING to not have to worry about what to eat when.

You just want to know it’s going to work. You don’t want to ever waste energy thinking “Is this ok?” or “Can I get away with this?”

I’m a rules eater.

I feel calmer knowing I have a routine to follow. I like that I spend as little energy as possible thinking about what and whenand how and how much with my food – it’s on auto-pilot, fairly systemised, following my rules.

I know that I don’t stick with just 3 chips. Once I start it’s an all-out-demolish-fest… and once that bowls gone I’ll be eyeing off the bowl at the next table… and then tomorrow I’ll be thinking about how to work hot chips into my day too. So it’s actually just a whole lot easier to NOT START!

Perhaps you’re freaking out just hearing about the mere existence of my rules?

Maybe, in contrast you’re: The GUIDELINES Eater?

That’s the person that hates the exact plan to stick to. You’d see it as RESTRICTIVE and BORING and you like to eat what you happen to feel like eating on the day, at that time… and you certainly don’t know what that’ll be in advance!

Either can work. The thing is you need to know which one YOU are and to then create your habits in accordance with your eating personality.

A rules eater is not going to be ok with a one square of chocolate a day habit which requires a whole block of chocolate to live at home. They’ll think about it non-stop. Conversely, the guidelines eater is completely capable of having just a serve – just a square of chocolate – when they feel like it. It doesn’t consume their thinking – however they would likely rebel against the thought of never letting chocolate enter the house.

Whereas I’m happy – relieved – to not have my tempting-trigger-foods living at home.

So beyond The Rules and The Guidelines Eater I recently discovered a whole new layer to add to successful habit forming.

It has to do with how we respond to expectations. Specifically INNER EXPECTATIONS and OUTER EXPECTATIONS.

So inner expectations would be those you set for yourself. Perhaps the habits you choose to form like starting your day with a green juice or going alcohol free Monday-Thursday.

Outer expectation are those set for us by others. Perhaps a work deadline or the eating plan your trainer gives you.

Credit to author Gretchin Rubin for this information. Here’s the link to a quiz she designed that gives you greater insight into how you respond to expectations in relation to your habits.

Gretchin talks about four tendencies.

1) The UPHOLDER. The upholder is likely to meet both inner and outer expectations.

If you’re an upholder you may find habit creation a little easier than some of us. The thing to be aware of as an upholder is that you’re choosing the best habits. Whenever you say Yes to something you automatically say No to something else.

The question to consider: Are my current habits best serving me so far as creating my ideal life?

A filter through which to assess your current habits, beyond of course the obvious: Your Results is, How do they stack up with your personal values?

If you’ve created a habit that is aligned with someone else’s values or expectations or just society at larges’ values then long term it could be costing you more than it’s benefiting you. Are you saying Yes to society and No to you?

It’s about what works for and resonates with YOU.

2) The OBLIGER. The obliger is likely to meet outer expectations and to resist inner expectations.

If you are an obliger you’re going to find it useful to have your trainer or an online community or just a good friend hold you accountable. Relying purely on YOU is likely not enough to keep you filling in a food diary however knowing you have to show it to someone else will help build the habit.

Equally if you’re an obliger you need to outplan your natural tendency to put others first. You might skip you workout because someone else needs a favour. Or perhaps you have time to cook the cake for someone else and not to plan your own nutritious dinner?

That’s when locking and loading a form of external accountability is going to help. You’d feel bad telling your friendly trainer you ate garlic bread for dinner… and you know she’s going to ask!

3) The REBEL. The rebel is likely to resist both inner and outer expectations.

If you’re a rebel following someone else food plan isn’t going to work so well. Equally you’re probably not going to embrace your own super-strict-restrictive rules. Rebels, I would guess you’re going to respond better to The Guidelines Eater approach.

Gretchin tells us rebels are less common however if you feel like you are one then my best advice is to ask yourself the question that works well for us all in relation to the habit you’re not yet keeping: How’s That Working For You?

There’s no judgement involved in this question it’s just a simple – face the facts – assessment. The good habits you create are to your benefit.

Think of how the habit you see the benefit in forming compliments your personal values.

Perhaps you value Freedom?

Well, good habits absolutely give you freedom. The freedom to rock around in a body you love. The freedom to work and play hard… to contribute more. The freedom to not waste energy, time and money stressing about that habit you still haven’t formed!

4) The QUESTIONER. The questioner is likely to meet inner expectations and to resist outer expectations.

If you’re a questioner – Me Too! The way to make this work for us is to get all the information we need – to ask the questions! – so that we know the benefit to us in forming and sticking to a habit.

When I look back on those habits that haven’t yet stuck – generally it’s because I’m not convinced they will work. I really don’t care what others think. I’ll skip the hot chips and be the odd one out because I know eating 3 hot chips doesn’t work for me and I also know demolishing the whole bowl doesn’t work for me. Equally I won’t commit to the fun run that everyone else is doing because, I’ve done the research and I know it’s not the easiest, most enjoyable, sustainable way to exercise for me.

As a questioner is very compelled to meet their inner expectations it’s important to ask yourself from time to time: How Do I Know This To Be True?

I know I’ve set unrealistic expectations for myself from time to time – based on not fact or results – but goodness-know-what-maybe-Guesswork? and then I’ve forced myself to stick to them through sheer unrelenting stubbornness.

Like the zero chocolate or any form of fat for a year because I believed it:

A) caused pimples and,

B) made me fat.

To get actionable today lets go with getting to know YOUR natural tendencies when it comes to habit forming.

The best step is to check out that quick 10 minute quiz that I’ll link to in todays show notes.

Or perhaps you’re already certain? To recap:

1) The UPHOLDER. The upholder is likely to meet both inner and outer expectations.

2) The OBLIGER. The obliger is likely to meet outer expectations and to resist inner expectations.

3) The REBEL. The rebel is likely to resist both inner and outer expectations.

4) The QUESTIONER. The questioner is likely to meet inner expectations and to resist outer expectations.

If you know which one you are then today’s actions step is to take that knowledge and apply it to that health habit that up until now has been a constant, frustrating, battle with yourself to try and enforce.

That’s it for today. I hope you can join me for Fridays show: Smart Simple Fat Loss: Prioritise v. Overwhelm.

If you liked this you’ll also like: Will Power: 6 Steps to Build Your Self Control Muscle. (part 2.)

If you’re yet to share the Healthification love – just click here to zip over to iTunes and leave an honest rating and review. It’d help me out big time. With gratitude, Kate.