That SUPER frustrating answer: You are not taking the right actions.
The thing is there are soooo many right actions that will work to lose weight. The trick is to find right for you… and by right I don’t mean best, most effective, most scientifically proven, most popular, fastest.
I mean what right actions you can make a part of your lifestyle – consistently, for LIFE!
I remember a previous boss – a guy I really respect – telling me the one thing he could not tolerate was having to ask for something twice.
Now this dude was absolutely a doer.
The type of guy who makes things happen. Some people just seem to have a natural ability to take massive action. Maybe they’ve had to work at building this skill however from the outside it looks natural and easy. Myself I’m more slow and steady – hugely consistent – though not necessarily quick off the mark.
Recently I admitted that in one aspect of my life it’s become more than just a lil slow off the mark, in fact I’ve become an “I’m Goner” rather than a Doer.
AND you know the ‘I’m goner’ goes nowhere!
So, if you can relate – perhaps so far as regular exercise, meal planning, alcohol free days or maybe taking the time to align your weight loss goal with your core values. Here are the steps I followed to say good bye to the ‘I’m goner’ and welcome the action taker in me…
We can rationalize ourselves out of results with astounding creativity. It’s super easy to come up with a reason why you don’t have time right? Or why it’s ok to just have that one extra serve/glass/bottle…
Step 1: is to instead turn your power of rationalization to what this will mean to your life if you continue down the I’m goner road. Think of I’m goner as always being I haven’t done – what will your life look like if you never actually do it?
As the great Yoda says there is no try. Only DO.
Immediate gratification is a whole lot more appealing than delayed gratification. Avoiding heart disease in 20 years time should be a more powerful motivator than those golden, crispy fries – often it’s not.
Step 2: is to turn your natural attraction to instant gratification to your favor.
To decide on the small rewards to enjoy when you take a positive action. This builds a positive association with taking that positive action – an immediate positive association rather than down-the-track-hard-to-feel-excited-about delayed gratification.
Until we take the time to brainstorm, write down, problem solve and prioritize what is actually involved to achieve something (each small step followed by each next small step) it can seem fairly overwhelming and hard to manage.
Step 3: is to systematically provide solutions to all your objections and excuses surrounding this particular ‘I’m goner’ challenge.
Each time you state “I’m going to” and don’t, you eat away at a little more of your self respect and your belief in your ability to follow through.
You make it easier to fall back on I’m goner next time too.
AND you teach other people that you’re not a person who takes action and makes things happen.
Step 4: is to build the pain you associate with being the person who does not follow through. How much respect – how much trust do you have for this person?
And that was my tipping point.
I’d laided the groundwork:
=> I knew I simply would not get to where I wanted to be without taking specific actions.
=> I decided on small rewards that ticked my need for instant gratification box.
=> I systematically provided solutions to every little excuse I had come up with.
=> Most importantly I built massive, fire lighting pain around being the goner instead of the doer.
What is your tipping point?
In 6 months time how will your life look if nothing has changed? What is your self-talk muttering as you make yet another “this time I’m super focused” claim like those you’ve never followed through with before?
How about 2 years from today? When you stay covered up, sweaty and self-conscious at the beach, because nothing has changed. Actually, if you’re still an ‘I’m goner’ then what you’re trying to avoid looking at in the mirror each morning has likely changed for the worse. Even more of your wardrobe is likely a waste of gorgeous clothes that can no longer be squeezed into.
Ten years from today. If nothing has changed, what does your life look like? Is it everything that you’d hoped for? Is it the example you’d expected to set for your kids… would you like them to follow in your foot-steps?
Although not pleasant to imagine, the pain you can create for yourself around exactly how life will be if nothing changes is huge fuel to ditch the ‘I’m goner’ attitude.
It takes courage to confront the reality of what you are creating for yourself.
To get clear and commit to becoming a doer. The good news, is that’s the hardest step. Taking the right actions daily that will get you weight loss results is not the hard part.
You’ve done harder things before.
The pain of staying unhappy with your health and your body is harder.
I re-experienced just a tiny fraction this recently when I lost 5.5 kilo’s in a week due to an evil bout of gastro.
Life just seemed a struggle. Even after the gastro was gone and I started to rebuild my frail and scrawny little body I felt miserable. I had low energy and my self esteem was shot. I felt self conscious and insecure and just downright weak. Weak of body and weak of mind.
There is no way I would choose to spend my days in that state. It’s just not FUN!
As much as it’s true you don’t know what you’re got until you lose it, I believe equally you don’t know what you’re missing until you get it. So if you haven’t been there yet – if you’re yet to experience loving the way your body looks and feels – then please trust me on this one…
It’s well worth the effort.