You’ve heard of the thrill of the chase?
I see this play out in weight loss. Perhaps even more accurate would be: the thrill of thinking about the chase.
In other words living stuck in a state of perpetual potential.
Perhaps you can relate? The endorphin hit you get thinking about achieving your goal.
Now absolutely this can be a really good thing. It can be a great way to lift your mood. The crucial factor is to turn thinking into doing. Of course it’s often more exciting to think about the end result than it is to take the actions that will get you there… those actions that can be so numerous they have the potential to lead to overwhelm.
Here are 3 symptoms of living in a state of perpetual potential and the solutions to get you action taking your way to the results you deserve:
You buy numerous books, courses, subscriptions, gym memberships… or spend hours scowling the internet or consulting with various professionals (or perhaps anyone who’s willing!) Sadly, you don’t actually use either the products or the knowledge you’re acquiring.
Common statements will begin “I’ll just see what the deal is with….” or “Let me just suss out such and such first…”
SOLUTION => Set a Deadline.
Parkinson’s law states that the amount of time something takes will expand to fit the time allotted. Not so helpful, if there is no set time allotted! For accountability, make your goal and deadline known to the people you love and respect.
Of course there is value in the right information however our current level of unlimited access to information (both great and crap-o-la) requires some self imposed limits and guidelines. Decide who your key influencers are and focus on modeling their success so far as it’s applicable to your lifestyle and goal. My main criteria for the people I’m influenced by are:
1. Do they have the results I’m seeking?
2. Do they conduct themselves with integrity and congruency (both professionally and personally) and also in a way that I’m inspired by?
3. Have they been recommended by someone else I trust and respect?
Action points: Where are you spending you time, energy. money and not implementing?
Who are the key influencers who fit your own ‘criteria for influence’?
Commit to your key influencers, ditch the others and decide on your deadline.
The benefit you receive for your current inaction seemingly out-weighs the benefit of taking action.
SOLUTION => Define the Complex Equivalents that will COMPEL you to take action.
This is simply a matter of reframing your current perception of the situation to encourage yourself to give up on secondary gain.
When ever (?) MEANS (?) a complex equivalent is at play.
I use to have a unhelpful complex equivalent regarding creating my best body.
I was in good shape, however I believed that to achieve the type of body sported by the ladies I admired (or more-so the pictures in magazines of these ladies) means “Giving up ALL the food and alcohol I love and doing heaps of hideous high intensity interval training”
How was that working for me? Great, at keeping me my same body shape! Fabulous, at allowing me my secondary gain of indulging in beer, hot chips, daily bread and easy machine based cardio.
It wasn’t until I started to focus instead on everything I could love about the changes required and all the pain of not making the changes, that I found myself able to make small, one at a time food upgrades and implement some (minimal!) high intensity interval training.
The results followed and they are easy to maintain because my new complex equivalents are: “Eating food I love that is also great for my body means I get to feel confident wearing whatever I want 24/7 365 days a year.”
and: “Skipping my high intensity training means it will feel that much harder and be that much easier to skip next time and that I’m an absolute integrity lacking hypocrite if I expect my clients to give their best when I don’t.”
=> Emotional intensity is key. Both Pleasure focused and Pain focused are effective for me. It’s worth experimenting with each to find which is more compelling for you.
Action points: In relation to the actions you want to take yet aren’t and also the actions you want to quit taking… What are your limiting complex equivalents?
What are you making these actions/inactions MEAN?
How is that benefiting you in the form of secondary gain?
What is the new complex equivalent that will compel you to take action?
Rather than high standards, perfectionism equals NO standards… because it does not, and can not exist. Hiding behind perfectionism is an excuse.
SOLUTION => Set Your Standards.
Aim to get a little bit better every day… rather than clinging to the need to be perfect before you make a start (because by definition that just can’t work right?!!).
I absolutely used to do perfectionism. At school I used to love art… and then I did a Fine Arts Degree… and I would agonize over the most intricate paintings and drawings. I’d get so close to the canvas I’d be asked if I was painting with my nose (!) and from time to time I’d actually use a toothpick when my finest brushes weren’t fine enough.
And although my favourite artist Salvador Dali wisely declares “Have no fear of perfection – you’ll never reach it” I actually didn’t break free of this constraint until many years later.
I wasted time seeking the unattainable and getting disappointed or even worse, simply not starting.
So, in setting your standards to break free of perfectionism:
1. Make yourself aware of the earlier efforts of those people you respect who are currently enjoying the results you’re seeking. In the same way that the people pumping out first class video’s that I admire didn’t dominate their first filming attempt… the person who seems to find it ‘easy’ to make time for training and food prep didn’t always find it that way. I guarantee it.
2. Take comfort in the knowledge that it’s about improving on today not getting ‘there’ and then maintaining for the rest of a tediously-boring-status-quo-life. As I can go back and update that last blog picture if it really is bugging me… you can get through 3 circuits in your next training session or complete 3 days of exercise next week instead of 2 or perhaps swap your bread for extra fibrous veg at dinner tomorrow.
3. Finally, decide on the standards that can guide your ideal day so far as creating your ideal health. To be clear, the standards are a GUIDE. They are never all or nothing. They are simply there to make it easy and clear for you so far as best case scenario.
Action point: What are the standards that guide your ideal health day?
*It can be helpful to take inspiration from the standards/rules you’ve (likely unconsciously) created in the area of your life at which you already excel:
Perhaps as a parent? A spouse? In your Career or Hobby?
If you’re after more help to the ideas flowing then check out my F.A.T. E.L.I.M.I.N.A.T.I.O.N. Standards. 14 standards that allowed me to 1/2 my body fat % and FINALLY ditch my flabby hips, thighs and butt… for good.
Just CLICK >> fat elimination tool << and this Free 4 page PDF is yours (with zero opt-in).