As a self-conscious teenager I believed that when I got my body looking exactly how I wanted it I’d be happy. That sounds somewhat shallow and self-obsessed now – however my world absolutely revolved around me as a teenager and I’m pretty sure that doesn’t make me the least bit unique.
There’s nothing wrong with wanting to rock around in a body that you feel confident, healthy and strong in… however, as I was to discover my formula for happiness was back to front.
The happiness comes first – before the success – be it in weight loss or business or anything and everything. Today’s show is inspired by Shawn Achors book, ‘The Happiness Advantage’.
I’m going to leave the science’y stuff to Shawn – as that doesn’t make me happy – and focus instead on: How reversing your happiness formula will help you create a body you love.
The FIRST problem with subscribing to an if I have (insert goal here) then I’ll be happy mindset is what happens when you achieve the first goal and add a new one?
Happiness is always on the horizon. You never actually get there.
The SECOND problem with if I have then I’ll be is it’s back to front… and it’s skipping that vital stage of doing. It’s the classic sow before you can reap… or the I’d be a clean eating gym loving person too if I had a body like you.
Alternatively, when you focus first on how you’re going to BE it’ll get you DOING and that will lead to the HAVING.
Are you with me?
I first encounter the BE, DO, HAVE model 4 years ago.
This model presupposes to have the result – the health, the lifestyle, the whatever you want to HAVE you need to DO the things to get you that result AND EVEN BEFORE the doing comes the BEING.
The person you have to BE, before you DO the things that come from this state of being, before you HAVE this things that come from what you’re doing.
If this is a new concept to you it’s ok if it’s making your mind spin a bit… it still does that to me. Let’s make it a little more tangible.
I first need to BE Grateful that I am even in a position to commit time, energy and money to my exercise and eating plan before I consistently Do the actions that allow me to Have the results.
I first need to BE Congruent with my core values and beliefs before I will consistently Do the actions that allow me to Have the results.
=> for example, imagine if my number Value is family and I see the action of regular exercise as time that takes me away from precious family time. No matter how much I tell myself I need to DO that exercise action it’s not congruent with that value of family that I’m drawn to. I’m going to fight it… it’ll be a constant battle to do the do until I can sort out who I need to BE. Perhaps, the effective congruent BE is the person that is a positive role model to those in their family by prioritising regular exercise.
I first need to BE Focused before I will trade in my tendency for stop, start shiney-object-quick-fix-program- hopping and consistently Do the actions that allow me to Have the results.
I first need to BE Self Certain before I will back myself 100% and consistently Do the actions that allow me to Have the results.
AND of course, I first need to BE Happy before I will see the positive, the opportunities and the learnings in any given situation and make the decisions to Do the actions that allow me to Have the results.
The list of positive states of being is probably limitless however these are 5 of my favourites.
Todays quote is from Shawn Achor: “Happiness is not the belief that we don’t need to change, it’s the realisation that we can.”
That quote really resonates with me, it speaks to me of hope, potential, progression and freedom. Most of all, of possibilities.
The most unhappy thing for me would be a lack of possibilities.
Whether that’s in relation to your health, your career, your relationship – happiness is both appreciating how you are being in the present AND also feeling excited by the possibility of what is to come.
Ok, let’s drag some actionable-ness out of this!
What are the 3 states of being that would be most beneficial in helping you achieving your health goal?
To recap, mine were to be Grateful, Congruent, Focused, Self Certain and of course Happy.
I’d love to hear yours?
You can let me know via the show notes for today. Just go to strongbodygreenplanet.com and type 061 in the search box at the top right.
That’s it for today. I appreciate you spending this time with me, so big thank you. I’ll be back tomorrow to chat about: Binging In Private.
If you liked this you’ll also like: 3 UNsexy Yet Impactful Components To Getting In Great Shape.
If you’re yet to share the Healthification love – just click here to zip over to iTunes and leave an honest rating and review. It’d help me out big time. With gratitude, Kate.